The Wookie Defense
by Evan Waldo
Summary: Leonard and Penny both make sacrifices. Spoilers for all seasons. Takes place following "The Ornithophobia Diffusion."


**I don't own any of this.**

"Hey Leonard," said Penny as they crossed paths at the mailboxes. "I'm going for a stroll outside. Let's walk and talk."

"Walk and talk, that's a funny expression," mused Leonard, picking up a package. "If we're walking and we're talking, aren't we walking and talking?" He unwrapped the package and tossed the wrapping into a recycling bin, packing peanuts flying around.

"Leonard, come," Penny ordered him sternly as if commanding a puppy.

"Right away," obeyed Leonard.

"What's that you've got?," asked Penny.

"Oh, it's a vintage 1977 Star Wars Chewbacca action figure. I bought it from eBay."

"Why did you buy a thirty four year old Star Wars doll online?," questioned Penny.

"It's not a doll. It's an action figure," corrected Leonard, following her out the door of the apartment complex.

It was dusk and the sky was getting dark early, the fall air was chilly. Penny shivered, clutching her arms together tightly. "Brr! Maybe that guy on Local Access is right and Global Warming isn't real."

"Actually global climate change can cause weather pattern anomalies of varying..." Leonard trailed off. "Do you want my jacket?," he asked, unzipping his black and grey sweat jacket.

"You never take off your jacket. Sometimes I think it's grafted to your skin," said Penny.

"You mean like Wolverine's animantium claws?," joked Leonard.

"Ani-who?," wondered Penny.

"Here," said Leonard, handing her the jacket. "Do you like my dispersive prism shirt? They were selling them at Target for some reason."

"You mean your Pink Floyd shirt?," corrected Penny.

"What's a Pink Floyd?," asked Leonard.

"Of course," concluded Penny. "You know what? This is great, you and me together. like buds!"

"Yea, we're a regular Watson and Crick, if Watson and Crick ever had sex togetheir," said Leonard. "Hey Penny?" he suddenly blurted, "Why have you never told me your last name? It can't be any more embarrasing than my name."

"You never asked," she responded, slightly embarrased. "Are you really that curious?"

"Inquiring minds. Yadda, yadda, yadda."

"It's Poindexter."

Leonard stood speechless. He looked at her without expression for a moment before bursting into laughter, slapping his knee. "Your name is Poindexter? You live across the hall from 2 physicists, one of whom you've dated, and your name is Poindexter? How perfect is that?"

"Don't make me hog tie you," she warned. "This is why I never told you!"

Leonard regained his composure and looked at her seriously, feeling guilty for his uproarious reaction. "I'm sorry, I of all people should know not to laugh. Why didn't you tell me, really? The irony itself is worthy of an O'Henry story." He couldn't help but chuckle again.

"I was just... self-conscious." she confessed, holding her head down and kicking a pebble at her feet.

He squeezed her hand. "You're looking at the King of Self-Conscious."

As they departed further from the building toward the street a large frat-guy looking type approached them. He had a goatee and wore a Dodgers ballcap and an Ed Hardy shirt and jeans. "Hey hot stuff, what are you doing with your son out so late?"

"He's my friend, creep. Get out of our way," she answered.

The man came closer. "Don't you want a real man?"

"He's more man than you'll ever be." Penny pushed the man back. He came toward her, wrapping his arms lasciviously around her neck.

"Come on hot stuff, be nice," he whispered menacingly.

"Get away from her," Leonard interjected.

"Or what? You'll waste me?," the man mocked.

"Unlikely," conceded Leonard, moving in between Penny and the thug, "but you're not going near her."

The stranger reared back and punched Leonard in the mouth. Leonard hit the ground, stunned momentarily, but rose to his feet undeterred.

"Is that all you've got? Do you know how many times I've been beaten up?" He was hit again, his lip bloodied, but Leonard stood his ground.

"How about I take your doll?," said the man, snatching the box from Leonard.

"It's. An. ACTION FIGURE," seethed Leonard, lunging forward with a haymaker with all of his force. He missed and hit the pavement.

"OK, enough grabass!," piped in Penny. She grabbed their assailant's arm and locked them into a Half Nelson. "Say Uncle."

"You crazy bitch!," he exclaimed.

"Say antidisestablishmentarianism," taunted Leonard, massaging his cheek.

"Let me go!"

Penny did so and he scurried away.

"Are you alright?," asked Leonard, turning to Penny.

"I'm not the one with a busted lip. Let's go back inside," said Penny with great concern. "You guys were right all along. The outdoors is dangerous."

"How did you do that?" said Leonard back at the apartment. Penny was preparing an ice pack.

"My dad made me join the wrestling team," she answered. "Thank you for sticking up for me," she said tenderly, touching his chin.

"Don't mention it. Ah! Not the face," he recoiled.

The next day at work Leonard sported a Band-Aid on his mouth along with his brown suitcoat and pants and yellow shirt and tie. He sat at his desk during his office hours, opening his desk drawer absent-mindedly and retrieving a spiral notebook.

"My journal from the Polar Expedition! I could've sworn I lost this when I threw it at Sheldon as we were leaving..."

He began to read.

"Leonard's Log,

I fear I may be going mad. If I have to particpate in one more game of Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spockwith Sheldon to determine who gets dibs on freeze-dried rice I may lay down in front of a snowmobile. I long for sweet death's embrace."

There was an indecipherable scribble over the bottom half of the page and he flipped to the next page.

"Dear Penny,

If I die of hypothermia or commit murder-suicide I want you to know how much you mean to me. You've always been special to me and I can't bear the thought of you not knowing that. You're unlike any other person I've ever met and I mean that in the best way possible. Thank you for teaching me so much, for making me better than I am"

Forever Yours,

Leonard, 90 degrees North latitude

Leonard sniffled as he closed the note book and returned it where he found it. He removed his glasses and dabbed his eyes with his jacket sleeve when he heard a knock at his door. In walked Penny, smiling and skipping over to hug him. "Hey bud! Just thought I'd drop in on you after last night."

Leonard smiled broadly with some shock. "Hey! I wasn't expecting you."

"That's why it's dropping in, silly," she kidded, breaking the hug and looking around. "So this is where you work. I hope I'm not interrupting..." It was a decent-sized office with a bookcase, a computer and a potted fern in the far corner beside the filing cabinet. His diplomas hung on the wall.

"Nothing that can't wait. Just research into particle acceleration, you know, no big whoop."

Penny noticed his Band-Aid and frowned. "Aww, poor thing. I can't believe you got hit in the face because of me." She dabbed a finger at his lip.

"I've gotten hit in the face for less important things than you," he told her, nodding reassuringly.

She looked into his eyes. "Have a nice day," she said with resignation, adjusting his tie with affection, spinning around to exit the office.

Leonard frowned. "Bye for now." As she left and shut the door he took something else from his desk- a framed picture of himself and Penny taken when they were still going out, the two of them on the couch at his apartment, her in his lap, both seated in Sheldon's spot. Sheldon was pictured with his arms crossed in protest.

"Leonard, wait." Penny bolted back in the door and shut it loudly, causing Leonard to drop the picture, the glass aroiund the frame breaking. "I have something I have to talk to you about." she said urgently. Wringing her hands together nervously, she pursed her lips, not sure how to express herself. "Thank you, again, for what you did for me yesterday. It showed a lot."

"That I can take a licking and keep on particle-accelerating?," Leonard offered whimsically, sweeping the glass from the picture frame under his desk with his loafer.. "I should quit this science thing and become a boxer." Standing from his swivel chair he put his hands in his pockets. "You've done a lot for me."

Penny blushed. "What can I say? Regional champ in my weight class right here," she cracked. Getting serious again, she went on, clearing her throat. "When you told me you loved me, I didn't know how to respond because I didn't know what love looked like. No guy had ever showed me true love, until you. All along I ignored my feelings, but what I felt for you is there. I do love you. I have to let you know that."

Leonard popped his knuckles and scratched his head. "Geez, for once I don't have the words to react. Give me some time to think about this?" He patted the legs of his dress pants and cast Penny an optimistic look.

"Sure," she said, nodding vigorously. "Sure, that's a lot for me to put on you. Give it some thought." She backed out of the office slowly, tentatively

Leonard nodded. staring at the shattered glass under his desk, not looking toward her. "Right, I'll think about it."

"THINK ABOUT WHAT?," howled Howard back at home that evening. He and Raj were at the apartment for_ Rock Band _rehearsal. Sheldon was in Texas visiting his grandmother. "What's there to think about? Penny pours her heart out in front of you and look a gift blonde in the mouth? To quote the prophet Stan Lee, you just hit the Jackpot, Tiger." He threw down his drumsticks in disgust.

Raj nodded in agreement. "Yea man, for guys like us, girls like Penny come around once every never." Moving his attention toward the TV screen he beamed, excited. "Hey, I love that song! Moneeey!," he wailed along to the game.

"So that's what a Pink Floyd is," Leonard said with surprise, fiddling with the buttons on his guitar controller, now clad in his everyday geekwear. "No wonder that little kid in the Target checkout aisle laughed at me."

"Hey, where's Sheldon?," wondered Raj.

"He's visiting his grandmother. It was an emergency. She made pancakes"

After Howard and Raj left Leonard decided to finish up some business from work. He flipped on his laptop. As he was checking his email he received one from the head of the unversity. He read it aloud.

"Dear Dr. Hofstadter,

You have been chosen to head the development of the Bevatron II particle accelerator at the Berkeley Lab at UC, Berkeley.

Please indicate your response."

"Great Nero's Poltergeist!," Leonard exclaimed, jumping from his chair. He threw his arms into the air and flailed them wildly. "I can't believe this! This is the greatest thing that's ever happened t-..." Then he read further. "2 years? It's half-way across the state! I can't be gone for... Penny." He lowered his arms and returned to his computer, typing his reponse.

"I respectfully decline. My obligations here preclude me. Thank you.

Sincerely,

Dr. Leonard Hofstadter"

Just then Sheldon entered. "I've got pancakes!"

Leonard turned his attention from his computer. "Are you going to share?," he asked, his voiced tinged with doubt.

"No," said Sheldon, "but I do have them."

"The head of the school wants me to head the development of the successor to Bevatron at Berkeley. I'm not going and I'm thinking about nominating you to take my place. How do you feel about temperate climates and hippies?"

Sheldon dropped the foil-wrapped plate of hot stacks he had been cradling. His expression was one of disbelief. He prepared to hug Leonard, but stopped himself. "No no, that won't do." He thought over how to share his gratitude. "I have been and forever shall be your friend," he said simply, quoting _The Wrath of Khan_. "I'm going to go pack," he said hurrying toward his bedroom

"You won't leave until next month."

"Preparedness is a mark of the leadership I will be expected to display under my new position," he said drolely.

The following day Penny burst through the apartment door, excited to tell Leonard the good news she had receieved. She carried his jacket under her arm. Leonard happened to be passed out on Sheldon's side of the couch. He threw himself off of the couch and dusted the area, adjusting everything to make sure the spot was precisely as Sheldon, who was esconced in travel planning, kept it. "Oh, Penny, it's you." He was partly relieved and partly uneasy.

"Leonard, guess what!"

"Absolute zero was discovered?"

"Yes, honey, Stephen Hawking told me. He left me a computer-voice-mail. No! I got offered a part in the new _CSI: New York _spinoff!

"Isn't that show already a apinoff? What's this one called? _Too Many Colans_? Heh heh heh." He laughed his slightly spazzed-out laugh.

Ignoring his joke, Penny continued. "This could be my big break!" She began to pace back and forth. "The only problem is it films in New York City and I would have to move there, which is why I came to you. You remember what we talked about yesterday. If you ask me to stay, I will. I can work at the Cheese Cake Factory until I find a job that's closer to home"

"I can't ask that out of you," stated Leonard. "Even if I have you here with me, I'd rather you be somewhere else if that's where you'd be happy."

Penny propped his chin up with her hand and smiled lovingly. "That just proves my point. It's the things you love that make you who you are, Leonard. Not what you do for a living, or how much money you make, and not how educated you are. You've made me the woman I am today." She held his jacket out for him to take. "Here, you forgot this." He declined.

"Will you keep it?" He put it on her. "Hey, it fits."

"We must be the same clothes size." She wiped away the tears welling up in her eyes with her palm. "I'm touched."

"Hold on..." He dipped his hand into his pocket and pulled out the note he'd written her at the North Pole. "I wanted you to have this. This is my answer to your question."

Penny unfolded the paper now and read the message. The tears were flowing freely now. She dropped the paper as Leonard leaned in to kiss her and for a moment it felt as if their souls were melded together, like flesh to animantium.


End file.
